Read all about it The world has pointed their stinky little fingers at the US of A regarding this disaster. Los Angeles radio station KFI has people on site back east and they report that the foreign media (French, Italian, German) are putting mics in people's faces saying "Zow, vhere is zee blame? All zees deths und sahdness..." They can't help but relish in our disaster, since it happened during a Republican president's term. However, it looks like the "deths" will be few, very few. Fewer than the tens of thousands who perished in something as harmless as a heat wave in France. Not a hurricane, not a Tsunami, not an earthquake. But a heat wave. Read all about that one. I guess the pluck of the citizens of the US of A stands, doesn't it.

Marla and I were discussing the apparent and rampant trend for males and females to fall apart after 30, kids or no kids. Says Marla: "These people didn't just hit the wall, it looks like they hit the wall, went back through the wall, in fact, it looks like they're just going back and forth through the wall!" I haven't laughed so hard with a sore throat in all my life.

Read all about it MWB can't help but glow in the slow burn of the funeral pyre of the Raiders football team in the first game of the season (the treasured and rare Thursday night NFL game). They are proof positive that NFL teams cannot be bought. That screwball owners can screw-up the team. And that no matter what, MWB be Raider Haters (go Chargers)!

Read all about it In search of the reason Irish youth have been killing each other over a dark, freezing Island for 2000 years, Dublin researchers have found changes in teen brains that may cause all their troubles.

Read all about it An icon of my childhood, the mere mention of Gilligan's Island and the death of Bob Denver puts me in a certain mood. It sounds sappy but really I was kind of a bitchy little kid and I rememeber all the scraps and laughs we had, with GI re-runs playing in the background. Sis and I were bonded over this shit (Family Affair, Bewitched, Brady Bunch, Partridge Family, I dream of Jeannie, blah blah). Barbara Eden is gone, Elizabeth Montgomery is gone, Dick York is gone, Jonas Grumby is gone, Jim Backus is gone. They're just about all gone. When the Brady Kids start knocking off, it's all over! (The total wipeout of the Family Affair cast just doesn't count. They were dead before we thought about getting old.)

Read all about it With the final tallies still far off, with the rescues still taking place, with human beings displaced from their homes and still living in sports arenas, Hillbilly Hag Extraordinaire is calling for a 9-11 like probe of this disaster. First, there's no doubt there were huge issues with the response. But there's enough blame to go around. Plenty. Something the pink ladies of the liberal media are not discussing is that New Orleans didn't follow its own emergency evacuation procedures. Second, the citizens facing these dire conditions did not leave New Orleans when they should have. Third, when the hurricane veered away from New Orleans, it seemed the threat was gone. In a few short hours, the breaking of the levee changed that scenario dramatically and quickly. Fourth, much of the human suffering was caused by the animalistic behavior of the people who stayed behind (intentionally, you recall). These factors, much, much more than any of Bush's failings, are the primary reason the human suffering reached the extent that it did. And finally, BUSH is NOT the government. The government is a combination of local, state, and federal bodies which include Senates and Houses of Representatives. I do not recall seeing Hillbilly Hagariffic pontificating in front of TV Cams before her exploitation-of-the-moment light bulb went on. Does everyone forget how she lied about her hideously ugly daughter's not-so-close brush with 9-11 to gain sympathy? She's so hagariffic, I cannot even write these words without gaining 12 points in my blood pressure.

This big, botox-deep frown line goes out to all makers of all mobile telephones in the United States of America. The manufacturers are ignoring and continuing an evile design flaw which has surely destroyed lives. Yes, lives! That flaw is...! It is that in non-flip phones, "locking" the keys doesn't mean the keys are "locked." The phone can still be accidentally answered by the unwitting holder of the phone. It's evile! Consider a recent Dr. Laura phone call... the woman called to tell Dr. L that she had overheard her husband on a date with another woman. Worse, he complaining about his wife (her!) to this woman! Dr. Laura was quite puzzled. "How did you hear this?" The woman explained that she simply called her husband, and the phone answered (even though he did not say "hello?") and the line was held open for the entire date while the angry Mrs. listened. Dr. L just didn't understand how this could have been and only barely seemed to believe what the woman said but finally took it at face value. Ahh, MWB understands what happened. The keys were "locked." The phone was in his pocket, probably on silent. He probably shifted one millimeter to pick up his salad fork and voila! The phone answered! And NOW the goddamn cell phones keys are locked and so it doesn't disconnect, and his wife can hear everything. So I say, to hell will go the cell phone designers who allow this to continue. So I say, buyer beware! Especially those up to some nefarious behaviors... your cell phone in your briefcase, pocket, purse, or car can shift while it's ringing with keys locked and answer itself. Demand change! Call your provider!

Read all about it Baby Brett Affleck brings us an article and shame on FoxNews.com for not carrying this, but it does go to show that CNN doesn't have the lock and stock on leftwing whacknut leanings. A massacre in Walmart was averted by a legally purchased, registered, and concealed weapon carried by a law-abiding citizen. This man should get Man of the Year. This should have been BIG news. I guess the leftwing whacknuts only care when many children are murdered (it keeps the population down and serves their goal of eliminating humans from their prized planet earth).

Okay MWB Mistress of the Blogworld Michela cannot avoid another small commentary on the hurricane. The leftists have peeled themselves off their grimy, tacky wallpapered walls (paint is bad for the environment) from every corner of their narrow-minded little worlds to blame this hurricane on the "global warming" (you mean, the current weather conditions?). They have said made back-handed comments that the USA "deserved" this for not signing Kyoto, or that it was due to that grand karmic equalizer in the sky, for not having signed Kyoto. Simpletons of the world, read on. "Global warming", the way you describe it, is faaaaaaaaarrr from a settled scientific fact. Here are the disputes: 1. One volcanic eruption spews more carbon gases into the atmosphere than 10,000,000 SUVs if they drove for 10,000 years. So the current "global warming" is far more likely to have been caused by volcanic activity than mere little humans in the US of A. 2. The most generous estimates of Kyoto say that if all meaasures were taken, the earth's temperature average will be reduced by 2 degrees. I saw the March of the Penguins. Does anyone think that those poor little penguins couldn't use a degree or two shaved off to ease their suffering? Hmmm? -80 to -70, even, would be quite nice for those little penguin guys and gals. Not thinkin', though, that -80 to -78 will much help. 3. Then, there's the fact that Kyoto lets third world cesspool nations spew as much shit into the air as they want. So, what is little ol' US of A supposed to do to counter all that damage? Hmm? 4. Lets go back a millenia or so, when they could farm on Greenland. So, what American SUV caused THAT global warming. Hmm? What about the flood of Noah's day. Hmmm? Fuck all you pinko shitbags who would use this horrible incident, or the tsunami, or any other perfectly natural disaster to assert your political gain. When the Repubs blamed gays and monkey bonkers for bringing HIV to the human race, they were less far off than left wing whackjobs saying that Tailand deserveed a tsunami to clear out the hotels which were wrecking the pristine land.

--Package engineering buffoons who make the packages of anything that gets sealed into a plastic box impossible to open without multiple sets of tools. I shudder for the day when I am too old to apply 600 pounds of force to get those packages open. --A huge, wrinkly, botox-bound frown line to hair stylists who cannot cut a straight line. I know I have fairly wavy (to curly) hair, but it does comb straight when wet. So why can't crackheads who just do that---cut hair all day, day in, day out, 5 to 6 days a week---why can't they cut my hair into a straight line. There has only been one hair stylist in the history of the universe who has been able to achieve this simple goal. He's so wonderful and I miss him so much (I moved 100 miles away and I'm still tempted to drive there for a hair cut!). Here is his number if you are in San Diego, go see Edward. The best hair cutter ever born. Edward at Salon Tonic, downtown San Diego:(619) 232-3721